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2020托福獨立寫作常見審題誤區

2023年08月17日

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很多考生在托福寫作審題方面出錯,那麼托福獨立寫作常見審題誤區有哪些?下面小編就和大家分享托福獨立寫作常見審題誤區。希望能夠幫助到大家,來欣賞一下吧。
托福獨立寫作:常見審題誤區
審題,是寫作的步,卻經常被大家所忽略。有太多考生只著眼於如何寫出漂亮的句子和高級的詞彙,而沒有搞清寫作的本質--考察學生針對某一話題進行準確連貫表述的能力。這也是為什麼很多同學雖然英語不弱,在托福考試的獨立部分中卻只能拿到 fai r或 good 當中較低的4分。那麼到底怎樣才能更加容易地拿到獨立寫作的滿分呢? 筆者今天將通過列舉以往考過的真題進行解析,告訴大家如何審題,換句話說,如何使高分變得更加achievable。
同學們考寫作考了這麼多年,大多數出題的形式都已爛熟於心,看到題目之後覺得熟悉於是興沖沖提筆就寫,其實,這種看似"熟練"的表象下藏著巨大的隱患--同學們很有可能因為看得太快而忽略某個決定題目意思的關鍵詞。例如:
例1:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising is the only main cause for people's unhealthy eating habits.
看到這個題目,同學們立刻會開始想,有沒有other reasons for unhealthy habits,想出三條如:1. People's tight schedules do not allow them to eat at regular hours; 2. Sometimes people are eager to lose weight or to keep fit so that they go on "endless diets"; 3. Bearing heavy burden both physically and mentally, some consider eating constantly as their most effective stress reliever. 綜上所述,advertising is not the only cause.
這個寫法看起來非常完備,但其實犯了一個不起眼卻嚴重的錯誤--題目不是要我們證明it is not the only cause,而是要我們去證明it is not the only main cause。多一個"main",意思是很不一樣的。如果我們只需要證明it is not the only cause,那麼找出other causes即可即例1中的寫法。但是,如果我們要證明it is not the only main cause,就需要證明other causes that we mentioned are also main causes,這就需要在每一段中加上一些專門的說明。或者,更簡單的辦法是去證明advertising is not even a cause, 直接在每段的末尾加上advertising與該段所論述的unhealthy eating habit無關的論述即可。If it is not a cause, how can it be the onlymain cause? 這樣一來,就不用通過證明還有其他main cause來反駁了,事實上,證明某種cause是main cause還是挺有難度的,因此筆者推薦同學們用後一種方式進行論述。因此,文章還是disagree,而三段的主題句分別應該是:1、1. People's tight schedules do not allow them to eat at regular hours, and it is obvious that they are too busy to be influenced by advertising; 2. Sometimes people are eager to lose weight or to keep fit so that they go on "endless diets", and this is more like a result of human nature, the pursuit of beauty, but not advertising; 3. Bearing heavy burden both physically and mentally, some consider eating constantly as their most effective stress reliever, and it is quite clear that no advertising encourages them to do so.
例2:Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Colleges and universities should offer more preparation for student before they start working.
看到這個題目,很多同學會可能會這樣寫:Agree. 1. Students should take morespecializedcoursesin order to be knowledgeable and skillful enough for their future careers; 2.Participating in internships helps students to have a clearer picture of their vocational development in the future; 3. Attending more club activities is an effective way to improve social skills, which are crucial for success both in life and at work.如果不看括號里的內容,僅看主題句,這篇文章是沒有任何問題的。然而,括號中的論述從嚴格意義上來講,是不能支持"more"這個關鍵詞的。舉個簡單的例子:"我們需要錢"和"我們需要更多錢"在證明的時候重點是不一樣的。如果證明"我們需要錢",應該詳細
闡述錢的"不可或缺性",比如生活、學習、教育都需要錢;但是如果證明"我們需要更多錢",重點則應該放在"錢不夠"的論述上,證明在學習、生活、教育方面的預算都很緊張。同樣地,上面的題目中僅僅證明Knowledge for careers, field experience and social skills are important是不夠的,事實上,這些根本不需要證明,需要證明的事情是graduates today are not well prepared in the three aspects. 因此這篇文章應該是一篇"抱怨型"的文章,詳細地去論述學校工作的不足。參考思路如下:Agree. 1. Many students today complain that they cannot learn practical skills and up-to-date information, for some of their teachers are not qualified enough to teach specialized courses; 2. Since many students are not allowed enough time to participate in internship programs before graduation, they know very little about what their future jobs like; 3. Joining clubs is possible for every college student, yet not every club provide is capable of offering enough opportunities for students to practice their social skills.
同學們在寫文章的時候一定要注意,學術論文寫作不是句型和辭藻的堆砌,整篇文章一定是一個well-organized system,這個system中很重要的原則之二就是--
1、每個中間段的topic sentence是用來支持main idea的;
2、topic sentence後面的每句話都是用來支持該topic sentence的。在上面的兩個例子中,大家會發現例1的錯誤主要是main idea沒有很好地被topic sentence支持;而例2的錯誤在於topic sentence雖然看起來是支持main idea的,但是論述的內容可能跟關鍵詞"more"無關,從而不能有力地支持topic sentences。這些錯誤的起因,則是對題干中關鍵詞的忽略。
托福考試作文獨立寫作範文:中學生應該在上大學前花時間工作旅行嗎
Students should spend at least one year working or travelling before they go to the university.
【題目大意】: 中學生是否應該在上大學之前拿出至少一年去工作或旅行。主觀點可以同意,因為一讓學生放鬆,二可以讓學生學到新的技能。
題目:Do you agree or disagree with the following statement:
Students should take at least a year to work or travel before beginning college.
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: After high school, students should have at least one year to work or travel. It's better than attending university straight away.
範文參考一:
The prevailing notion is that high school students are under huge pressure. Then appears a controversy whether students should have one year to engage in other things before they attend their university. After weighing the pros and cons, I am favor of the opinion that having a gap year can produce many benefits.
First off, students can benefit a lot from traveling. As everyone knows, to maintain strong competitiveness, high school students are required to accomplish a wide range of either required or optional curriculums at school and the rights to develop their own interests have been deprived relentlessly, which has proven to be a detriment of their growth. Instead of pursuing their bachelor degree without pause in the college, traveling can help them regain chances to cultivate and perfect their personalities and release pressure. For instance, many more college graduates are reported to be indifferent to the society and show no mercy on those in need, part of which owes a lot to the fact that schools lay more emphasis on cultivating students』 academic abilities and downplay the importance of developing their overall qualities. Traveling to those places in poverty can give students a sight of those impoverished families to call on the sense of responsibility. Besides, by paying a visit to some places of interest like the Great Wall or the pyramid in Egypt, students can approach the greatness of diverse culture. What’s more, the direct access to the natural world can appease students』 inner uproar. Accordingly, a gap year can be a great asset for high school graduates.
Secondly, by taking part-time jobs, not only can students accumulate sufficient social experience but also earn some money to reduce financial stress on their families. Though economy in China keeps growing at a rate of almost 9 percent in the recent, average citizens still suffer huge pressure especially when the slump of stock market took a heavy toll on them and the majority of stock investors withdrew their money and reinvest to the real estate, further increasing pressure on the ordinary because of the increasing prices of housing. For most families from small cities and rural areas, college tuition still appears to be a great burden on them and by taking part-time jobs, students can earn some wages to relieve financial pressure, such as serving as a restaurant attendant that enables students to better develop their communication techniques and learn more about how to meet the demands of consumers or working as a salesman that will be an entirely different experience from high schools and can lead to the cultivation of the ability of presenting customers the advantages of products. Obviously, a gap year means a lot to high school graduates.
Admittedly, there is another voice that high school students are supposed to start their campus life immediately after graduation from high schools. To be more specific, maintaining high-efficiency study can lead students to be better acclimated to their college life. Instead of going to college soon, a gap year may disrupt their study schedule and weaken their learning skills. It appears to be sensible, however; the ultimate goal of attending a university is to seek a decent job and gaining social experience in advance makes students more conscious of which kind of area they are more interested in in the near future such as the serving industry or high-tech fields.
In conclusion, high school graduates had better live a different life temporarily before they go to college.
寫作參考二:
Gap year, a break between high school and college, has become a trend among many American and European students theses years. As the popularity of gap year has grown, so to has its appeal. Generally, it can be constructed or unconstructed . The idea of gap year has been strongly questioned by some nervous parents, however, some supporters contend that it will be a lifelong treasure which enables one to have the full command of his life. From my perspective, taking a year to work or travel before college brings about more advantages than shortcomings.
To begin with, a gap year helps guide students』 future education and life goals. Most of young students do not know exactly what they wanted to do once they left high school or even half way through college. Working or travelling a year will give them some 「real world experience」 as well as insight into their interests and strengths which will help them shape a path to a successful career. Once students learn a whole lot about themselves, they are likely to take full advantage of college. Take an Australian boy for an example. Enjoying his gap year in Nepal, he helps the locals in Pokhara to build their organic farms. He is so passionate about what he is doing now and he decided to pursue environmental science after he comes back to university. The internships and professional experience gained over the gap year will have much more influence on the development of one’s future than college.
In addition, taking a year off can refresh the tired-out high school graduates. In general, it will take at least ten years before jumping into the long and challenging years of university. There is no doubt that studious students will spare no effort to improve their academic performance with the expectation that they will receive offers from their dream schools. Under the competitive pressure of high school, they will not only prepare for exams such as SAT or ACT but also seek for voluntary opportunities to enrich their Curriculum Vitae. My younger sister used to travel to Cuba to volunteer with brown bears for three months. After that she went to Europe driving her Vespa across more than 20 cities. She said it was so different from school. She won』t have to attend a test at then end of the trimester, which means that there is no peer pressure or any pressure from outside. At the same time she can reorganize her mind which was full of chemical equations, historical events as well as verses from poems.
It is true that students who choose to drop a year are more likely to lose their study skills. During the gap year, there will be less chances for them to participate in actual classes in college. Without attending lectures given by famous professor and communicating face-to-face with classmates, the whole learning process will be incomplete. Many of study skills could not be developed and trained, which leads directly to the deprivation of both academic ability and motivation. However, it won』t be a potential problem nowadays because most of top universities offer MOOC . Students can study random topics through free online classes. Although they don』t have any college credit, they learned a lot, met wonderful people, and keep their brains in shape for college.
Ultimately, the benefits of gap year far outweigh the only drawback because it can help exhausted students relax both mentally and physically and provide them with the opportunities to take a step back to focus on their goals, leading to a stronger sense of direction once they』re back in the classroom.!
寫作參考三:
Under the educational system of many western countries, taking a gap year, a period of time when students can take a break from formal education, has become quite common. When it comes to the pros and cons of spending at least one year working or travelling before attending university, people』 preference may vary from one to another. As for me, it is advisable for high schoolers to have a year off to work or travel, in order to relax themselves and gain new skills.
In the first place, spending a year travelling will provide high school students a good chance to escape the daily grind. As is common sense, the life of high schooler are filled with countless assignments, various quiz and exams, which nearly drive them to be stressed out. Obviously, what they need most is the vent for releasing all the tensions and pressures accuring in the rapid rhythm campus life. Consequently, taking a break from educaion and going away for while can fulfill this function well. During the gap year, students can surf in Hawaii, wake boarding in Italy, go bungee jumping in New Zealand and enjoy the sunbath on the seashore of Miami. Such a short escape from the daily bustle and hustle will be conducive to their mental and physical wellbeing. Not only this, but travelling during a gap year can provide a renewed vigor for stuy and a more focused approach to learning.
In the second place, taking a year off to do some internship can help high school students acquire more new pratical skills and thus adapt to the university life more smoothly. Many gap year students choose to do voluntary work. This could include teaching in the mountains in Nepal, a conservation project in Madagascar, an expedition in Costa Rica or an internship in Japan. All these experiences of taking voluntary jobs during a gap year will provide you with much more than any classroom setting ever can. We can learn a lot in the classroom, but it isn't until we put it into practice in the real world that we really understand what's going on. To be specific, throughout school we are surrounded by the same folks at similar ages. However, while working in a company, we are bound to discover others, make new friends, and interact with people from all walks of life, which will defnitely hone our social skills. It is undoubted that people with strong interpersonal competence can enjoy great popularity among classmates and teachers.
In a nutshell, it is a wise move to spend at least one year travelling or working for the sake of taking a break from daily routine and acquire new skills.



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